


everything that was trying to take us down

by pndraa



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/F, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Bahrain and Post-Bahrain, TW meds, Well it is now, is that even a proper tag, it's not explicitly stated but Maria has depression here, mention of meds, slight angst, tw depression, welp i just wanted to touch a little deeper on maria
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-24
Updated: 2016-04-24
Packaged: 2018-06-04 04:47:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6641947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pndraa/pseuds/pndraa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>People change, people have feelings, and people keep close. It's life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	everything that was trying to take us down

**Author's Note:**

> As I mentioned in the tags, Maria is not explicitly stated to be suffering from depression here, but she is, and I wrote it with that in mind. So slight warning. Also medication is mentioned here, in case you'd like to be warned first. Hope this one makes sense!

Top of the class, first to be promoted, the leader of her team, _alone, helpless._

Really – Maria Hill can’t help that she got a head start with her training when she joined and subsequently left the Marines a few years back. It was pointless being jealous. So what if she fought better? So what if she was quicker on her feet, and was even quicker in the head? _So what if her own loneliness was going to kill her someday? So what if everyone else with their cliques and judging eyes never saw how she felt?_

The only thing left that mattered to her was the mission. The spur of the moment. The action, the firing of a gun, the body collapsing into a lifeless heap of flesh, the blood on her face and hands.

It was a meaningless repetitive pattern. Maria didn’t care.

* * *

 “Promise me you’ll stay.”

The two were lying in Maria’s bed, with Maria being absolutely exhausted from her whole night of drunken crying and yelling, and Melinda being worn out from her various attempts to get her friend to stop drinking.

The younger woman buried her face into Melinda’s neck, taking in the comfort and warmth. Melinda wrapped her hands around Maria.

She hesitated. She could not promise anything.

“I’ll be there for you.”

* * *

“Good work, deputy director.”

Maria rolled her eyes. “Well, not yet. If the next two tests go well enough I just might be.”

Melinda smiled. “You’ve passed the last eight.”

“That’s because you’ve been training me,” Maria said to her S.O.

“Suck up,” Melinda replied, chuckling.

“But really, shouldn’t you be deputy director?  You’re better than me in every way I can think of,” Maria said.

“Leadership scares me,” Melinda said. “Besides, you’d be a great deputy director.”

“It’s weird. You’ve got more seniority than me, and you’ve been through more than me.”

“Come one. You’ve been through pretty tough shit yourself,” Melinda said. “And you have more time until retirement. I think that’s why they chose you.”

Maria laughed. She didn’t expect herself to make it the retirement age.

* * *

 

“Hey,” Maria said, sitting down next to her S.O. “I heard about what happened in Bahrain.”

May kept silent.

“Coulson and Fury were debating whether you should be kept on the field, and I told them that they should let you transfer no matter how good a field agent you are, but they wouldn’t listen,” Maria continued. “I think I’m getting to Coulson, but Fury needs a little more persuasion.”

May acted as if Maria wasn’t there at all, yet Maria acted like May was conversing with her normally.

“So anything new with you recently?” She asked casually. “I’m finally off meds.”

Melinda looked down in acknowledgement. Maria was hoping that meant something like _“I’m proud”_ or _“I knew you’d get better”._

“Well, it’s been nice speaking to you. If you ever feel like speaking again, you can speak to me,” Maria said, standing up to leave.

She smiled at Melinda, whose eyes did not follow her. “I’ll be there for you.”


End file.
